Friday, April 4, 2008

Road Trip

Might be driving a few hours in the morning to Prescott, Arizona, where John McCain is doing a campaign stop. I was mostly excited about my son going, because how often do you get to show your kid the whole presidential thing in person? But Shay's dad has camping plans for him, so he'll be doing that.
Okay, fine. An adult weekend it is!!
After McCain, we'll drive an hour or so to Phoenix so Steve can play at the drag strip.

I found out today that something I delegated to a person back in September wasn't actually done. It's for our Cancer fundraiser, and she offered to take care of the reservation for our banner to be hung up on Main Street. If you don't reserve the space, six months in advance, then you don't get the space. Now I have this HUGE expensive banner and no place to put it. No one can ever say that I didn't try delegating. I've found out time and time again that if you want it done right, you do it yourself.
So pissed right now. Here comes the headache!!

Last night we took the SS Minnow out for dinner on the lake. Subway sandwiches, champagne, and a starlit cruise down an empty river. Very nice. We took a couple of friends with us and they couldn't believe how much fun they had, without a stripper pole! That's the trend right now, putting a stripper pole on your boat.
We're waaay behind the times.

Thursday, April 3, 2008

Sleep Is Good

Inconsistently, my early waking insomnia has been torturing me since 1997.
Early waking is when you go to sleep okay, but then you wake up at 2 or 3 am and never go back to sleep. I say inconsistently because I don't have it all the time; I will suffer for a few months, then it goes away. It's not tied to a certain time of year, stress, hormones, apnea, anxiety, physical activity, or work load. It's just there.
Everyone has suggestions, but rarely does anything work. I've been to doctors, I've taken all sorts of prescription and non-prescription stuff, I've talked to a counselor, I've tried all sorts of mind-over-matter techniques, and I've seen a whole lot of middle of the night t.v. programming. I tried to work the night shift for quite some time, and that was a huge mistake. Just because you have insomnia, it does not mean you are naturally cut out for that stuff.
One thing remains, though. I have a bad habit of internalizing things that bother me. At 2 am, those things come to the front of my mind. I am in general a secure person, but there's those little items that I don't seem to react to--and they resurface when I'm laying there trying desperately to go to sleep.
Some negative comment that someone made to me, an unfriendly look from a guy who is normally very open and friendly, the feeling that I've let someone down....I could go on and on. It leads me to believe that I'm waaay more insecure than I act.
The insomnia has started to subside lately, I've been able to get more than 4 hours of sleep each night and that's HUGE.
But then Steve mentioned to me yesterday that his older daughter, who is away at college, wants to sit down and have a one-on-one conversation with him because she "never told him something." She wants to talk to him without me present and that makes me ENORMOUSLY self conscious. I shrugged it off at first but then later started wondering if I did or said something to her that insulted her. Or hurt her. Or pissed her off. I know that not everything has to be about me, and these people all have their own lives; it's just the fact that her request to talk to her dad without his girlfriend there makes me cringe. It throws me back into that mindframe that I am waaay down there on the totem pole, below even the cat or dog.

Or maybe it's just nothing.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

We're In the Money

Well, not really because all the money goes to the American Cancer Society.
I raised $700, but $200 goes to Steve because he sold something that he
really didn't want to sell. I MADE him sell the pinball machine. It was taking
up so much space in the garage, and it was rediculous to believe that we would someday move it into the house and play it.
I was certainly exhausted, because I was the only one who worked the sale. By that I mean I moved all the merchandise outside, priced it, worked all day and then moved the stuff back in at the end of the day. Then got out there the next morning and
moved everything outside at 5:30 am, and worked all day. I did well, though,
because all I've got left is some clothing and the Christmas stuff. I had a literal Christmas land over on one side of the yard, with a tree and decorations. None of it sold. It's going to the thrift store today.

We've decided this weekend that since Steve's boss is busy with jobs in Hawaii and my boss is gone to work in California, that we're taking off out of town. We have to figure out where we're going yet. Likely we won't have kids with us, so I can research some destinations online that aren't necessarily 10 year old friendly or teenage girl friendly. Yay for meeee!!!