How To Trim a Cactus Plant

How do you trim a cactus? VERY CAREFULLY....

I just love cacti (notice I used the grammatically correct plural form of the word)
I can't get over how easy they are to maintain. And to plant. Really, all you have to do, is stick a cutting from a cactus plant into the ground and it will grow. I wish it were that easy with everything else in the yard.

Last spring I needed to lop off a few growths of the cactus I'd planted in the back yard, so I grabbed the tongs and a cardboard box. Nevermind that I was wearing flip flop sandals and a bikini. It was HOT outside. The first trim that I made fell straight onto my flip flopped foot. Steve walked around the corner just in time to see all the 2" long needles sticking out of my toes. There had to be about 20 of them. He quickly set into action by taking a photo with his cell phone and quipping, "I'm going to title this picture, "Redneck cactus trimming." Not cool. Not cool at all.
These particular cactus needles form an air vaccuum once they dig into your skin. Pull as hard as you want, they won't come out. You have to snip off the ends with a pair of very sharp scissors in order to break the air vaccuum and get the needle out of your skin. It hurts as much as it sounds like it does.

This year I decided to at least wear some good shoes, so I wouldn't have a replay of last year.

But I forgot gloves. Welding gloves....


At least it was only one needle.

I worked diligently, using my tongs to coordinate the trimming and disposing.



No more cactus trimming. Not this year, anyway.

Almost Famous

I sometimes host a local t.v. show. It's incredibly awful, but it's a start.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VxLYg5xULLg&feature=PlayList&p=CFD0D4BC5A6AB55B&index=4

Old Photos

My brother requested that I scan some old pictures that I managed to salvage out of the garbage back in 1989, so ever since I have been going thru my photo albums and boxes to see what I could come up with.

I don't know who this is, but it's a funny photo, huh?



And this one is from a couple of years ago, when we were in Mexico for an off road race and I found out the Black Pearl from the Pirates of the Caribbean movies was anchored nearby. So I ran over and got some shots. Then I took a photo of the Pearl. Haaa....hahahahahahaa.......


Shay dressed as GI Joe for Halloween one year. I think he was 4 or 5 years old....


When I was 4 I had an obsession with Cookie Monster. He was hilarious, in my opinion. A comic genius. So all I wanted for my Birthday was a Cookie Monster. And that's all I got. BUT....this picture doesn't have me in it. Why? Because when my sister (we are calling her the Great Big Fat Person right now) cried and cried and cried so much when she saw that I got a Cookie Monster for my Birthday that my parents took it away from me and gave it to her. "oh, we'll get you another one from the store." And there were no more Cookie Monsters at the store. So here's Jaime enjoying my Birthday present.

Gee, ya wonder why I still don't talk to her?

Here's a photo of my son and his cousin Skylar, at a homestead near my mom's out in the desert. Yes, we have mountain lions. And yes, they kill people.


Whenever I see this photo, I think of Garth Brooks' song "The Dance." It's actually a picture that I remember having taken of me and my dad. I don't know why I preferred to hang out in the living room in my underwear.


Here is a natural progression of events. My brother is in this first picture, refusing to wear the motorcycle helmet that's been placed on his head. The second photo is an example of what happens when you don't wear a motorcycle helmet on your head. Go figure.





This last photo is from the Glamis sand dunes in California. We camp there occasionally. Steve would like to camp there every day of the winter, but that's just not humanly possible. At the end of the day, people gather in one area called the "Sand Drags" and they race their quads, sandrails, motorcycles, trucks....you name it. As the sun set, I caught this photo...

Family Photo

This was in Arkansas, probably in July of 1976. I am in the front, looking off to the side. Probably looking for a nicer family to run away to.

The Last Time R.J. Visited....

Well that would have been somewhere around late 1988, and obviously we were much younger and hipper back then. Now our hips hurt, that's the only hip thing going on here.

The girl with the tennis racket....hmmm....she wasn't really much of a friend and I can't even remember her name. But the one next to her was a neighbor girl and last I heard she was experimenting with controlled substances. Then there's Stacey, in the middle, who still lives in Omaha and has a little baby girl. Then me, and R.J.

Funny Picture

That's a vulture Shay is attempting to sneak up on.

Mother's Day. Hmmmm...

I got roses and cards in the morning, then we promptly began the process of getting the boat ready for a day on the lake. It's the first time the boat has been anywhere since last September, so it was in need of cleaning and fuel, towels, coolers with drinks and snacks, ice, etc. On and on and on.
Steve's daughter brought the only friend of hers who can definitely be labeled an a-hole. Yes, she is a total a-hole. I would like to be nice and call her difficult but Shay and I have personally seen her in action.
So I figure for Father's Day I will just ask Steve to name any a-hole. Just name one. And I will invite that a-hole to spend the day with us.

Shay and I entertained ourselves. We played frisbee on the beach, doing different Karate Kid motions between each throw. Then we took flattering photos of each other.




We saw burros! They were heading back into the desert after having a drink at the lake. Pretty cool to see a whole family of them.





I had a turkey in the slow cooker at home, but once we got there no one would eat except Shay and I. So we enjoyed some wonderful Mother's Day turkey by ourselves. Lovely!!!

The Smoker Smokes!

The wood we picked up last week in Phoenix was tested in the HUUUUUGE restaurant smoker, and a nice batch of ribs and tri-tip was produced. NIIIIICE.....

And Shay had his share of the meat, right there in the hangar in front of the Cobra attack helicopter.





Watching him eat reminds me of those "Feed the Children" commercials you see on t.v. in the middle of the night.