Shay took his cell phone with him when he went to dad's, and that's a very good thing. He called me, in tears, asking to be picked up because his dad's girlfriend was picking on him and yelling.
Normally I get him to calm down and I tell him to go talk to his dad about it. Which, really, is the right thing to do.
But this time he was sobbing and I couldn't get him to stop. So, I hopped in my car and went straight over there.
It was ON. His dad's girlfriend was belligerant, loud, unreasonable, and it didn't matter what I said she wasn't listening. Basically I laid it out: I'm mom, dad is dad, we make the rules and we don't want some other person bossing Shay around.
She has forbid him from going to play with his cousins next door, because she doesn't get along with them. I say, too bad. He should be immune from her drama problems.
She has also decided that she doesn't have to get him up so he can get ready for school. (she hasn't driven him to school all year, because of a DUI she lost her license. so I pick him up and take him, even when he's over at dad's)
Last week I picked him up for school and he hadn't eaten, showered, or brushed his teeth.
He didn't have an alarm clock in his room, and he overslept. But his dad's girlfriend was down the hall gossiping with someone on the phone. Too busy to wake him up.
When I explained my side of things, without raising my voice or using a curse word, she responded by yelling obscenities. When I told her that my son is stressed out from all the drama and problems over at their house, she said, "Fine, Shay, get your shit, get out, and don't come back!" His dad just stood there. I could tell he was just wore out from all the fighting that goes on with this woman, so I certainly didn't pick on him anymore. I left with this, "That is your son crying in my car, and these huge fights are what he's going to remember about his childhood with his dad. How can you stand to hear him cry over something your girlfriend started??"
I'm not making ultimatums about whether or not Shay can go back to dad's house, but I'm definitely going to make sure he doesn't go back until things are fixed over there.
Five minutes with me, and Shay was already better. But then he got to my house and discovered his new Super Mario game had come in the mail. Suddenly, dad and his girlfriend didn't exist.
